A person I used to know at school - she wasn't a friend exactly but we both liked watching Quantum Leap and slacking off during German classes - connected with me on Facebook a few years ago. Nothing unusual there. Like many of the rest of us former-school girls, she married and got pregnant, puffed up and had a baby. Unlike many of the rest of us, the baby - Maeve Elizabeth McCormack, died during labour on 16th April 2013, and my friend's journey through unfathomable grief began. Some people could not bear to be in the presence of her sadness and withdrew. Fortunately her family and true friends rallied around. Via Facebook I read about my friend's brave battle with grief - sometimes it takes her down but, like a cork, somehow she always manages to bob back up to the surface. From afar I read her struggle to find meaning in her life after Maeve's death. She has written eloquently and honestly about her experiences and very often moved me to tears. We have exchanged many messages. I have come to know her a little better than I did at school and come to respect and like her even more than before. She has often mentioned how much it helps her to know that people say Maeve's name out loud, and she loved the idea of doing random, kind things for others in her name, especially on Maeve's birthday.
And that's what gave me the idea for this blog and the its random acts of kindness. What if I could pre-pay for a few coffees at my local cafe and ask the proprieter to give those coffees to people who seemed to be having a hard day? And what if, rather than hold up a line of irritable, yet-to-be-caffeinated people, the barista gave them a little card that explained that the point of this random act of kindness was to remember a baby girl born sleeping? What if I could somehow manage to inspire lots of strangers to say Maeve's name out loud? It won't bring her back. But it's a way of fighting back from hope's corner. I can't bring her back to her family but perhaps I can bring her into the present for a few seconds, over and over again, by means of teeny, tiny good deeds thrown lightly and hopefully into an otherwise cynical, modern milieu.
So in that spirit, I hope; I hope that doing this isn't totally crazy; I hope that it will lift up my friend and her wonderful husband as they live on with their little girls, one living and one in heaven; I hope that it will bring momentary rays of sunshine into strangers' lives; I hope that people will say Maeve's name and know that she existed; I hope that they might come here, to this blog and let me know if they enjoyed their random free coffee, or having their parking paid for or whatever I get up to with my funny little cards. And I hope that perhaps they will pay it forward - that they will help someone else in a similar fashion, and do so in Maeve's name. And I hope that maybe I will get to hear about that too. And yes, perhaps nothing will come of it. But I will continue to do it anyway. Unless my friend asks me not to. In which case I will immediately stop.But I asked her, and she seemed to like the idea, so for now, it's a go. My cards are being designed and will soon be out there.
So for now I must get on with those and look forward to finding out what the Maeve Effect will be #themaeveeffect
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